If you have an autistic child, what needs to change?
Is it them, is it things around them or is it actually you?
Both my boys are autistic, one far more severely so (with pathological demand avoidance thrown in for good measure). It doesn’t define them but it is the reason for this article. As they have struggled, so have I – they adapt to a world not in tune to their needs; I adapt to parenting children […]
How I came to realise that one aspect of my son’s autism that has always concerned me may actually be an enormous strength and benefit.
If I could write a letter to my former self, the me that has just been told by my wife that she thinks our son is autistic, this is what I would say. Dear Jon It’s me, it’s you. You won’t doubt that I’m me, but how can I prove I’m you? I know – […]
The list of things we once took for granted but now can’t do is lengthy. We can’t see groups of people. We can’t socialise as we once did. Many of us can’t leave our immediate areas. We can’t travel abroad easily, we can’t plan, we can’t spend money as our incomes are so reduced. We […]
Our family is a little bit different. If you meet us, you’ll probably remember us.
An inability to make decisions on even the smallest of things is destroying my mental health. Here’s to overcoming the problem.
Wouldn’t it be great if finding out that your child was autistic wasn’t portrayed as a negative. Maybe it varies depending on where you live, perhaps our experience was atypical, I’m willing to be talked round if my anecdotal view is proven to be false (I’d make a terrible anti-vaxxer with that willingness to listen […]
Life moves pretty fast, if you don’t… Usually my blog posts have three or four pars of intro before really getting to the point – I think that stems from university and a desperate need to waffle in history essays to get them anywhere near the word count. Let’s forego that this time though, no […]
Note: I enjoy writing blog posts that I would have found useful a few years back, as I set off on the journey of being an autism parent. They’re still useful to me now tbh as a reminder of how to act. Hopefully they’re of some use to other too. One of the true gifts […]
I am absolutely knackered. I’ll come on to why but it’s also good to get that out from the start as an excuse for what follows. I’m tired, that means that what I think to be good writing will be rubbish, you should lower your expectations accordingly. I’m knackered because I’ve been working quite a […]
1. ‘The eyes though. You have to admit the eyes are unusual.’ ‘He’s got lovely eyes.’ ‘OK yeah, sure. He has lovely eyes, they are just very intense.’ ‘It’s not his eyes, it’s what he focusses on, that’s what you mean.’ ‘You’re right. Staring right at you. I feel like I’m being interrogated whenever I […]
Should I tell them my son is autistic? That’s a question I have asked myself at times, usually just after he has done something a little, shall we say, out the ordinary. Will telling them explain the behaviour? They’re strangers, does it matter what they think? What are the negatives, what message does it send […]
Not enough autistic adults are in full-time employment, you don’t need me to tell you that. It’s a scandal, it’s a disgrace, but it’s not just a problem for those of us with a direct interest in the rights of those on the spectrum. Workplaces with a higher representation of autistic employees would benefit absolutely […]
If you have an autistic child you will know that often their inability to complete a task is not because they have an inability to complete the task. They could do the task if only it was made accessible. There is a solution though and it is a simple one – time. I’m going to […]
Autism quiet hours help us answer a very simple question. Do you want to go to the soft play when there are 37 children per square foot and you’ll be lucky to get parked within six miles? Let me think. Hmm, no not really. Do you want to go to soft play when it’s almost […]
A worrying fact – only 16% of autistic adults are thought to be in full-time employment in the UK. In case you’re wondering what the overall figure is for adults in full-time employment, it’s well over 60%. The Tories might be intent on taking us into full blown economic winter but full-time employment rates aren’t […]
Autism hours are a godsend. You won’t hear me say a word against them. The benefits are obvious, making everything from basic resources through to fun experiences accessible to all. Without occasional autism hours it would be impossible for us to visit the cinema, or the aquarium or even the supermarket as a family. We […]
I recorded 30 seconds video of my son’s hands while he built in Minecraft the other day. As you do. The pace of movement was incredible. His fingers darted across the keyboard, choosing objects from the inventory, placing them, choosing other objects, building upwards, adding a sign and typing – near touch-typing, instinctively self-taught. This […]
‘I’ll fix it later’ Usually I’m the the person saying that in our house. It might be the flooring trim that has lifted between the lounge and corridor. ‘I’ll fix it later’. Maybe it’s the fridge which seems to have some sort of small blockage that is causing it to slowly leak, ruining the wood […]